But it's also been my favorite month of marriage so far.
While I was definitely not prepared for all of the joys of being married to a man the day I said 'I Do', here are a few things I can tell you about marriage 144 days later:
1. Husbands do not think that Ramen and ice cream qualify as dinner. [Hayley never complained]
2. The cable bill is due EVERY month!
3. If you wait long enough he will do a load of laundry.
4. Your husband is NOT your sister or your roommate. He will not help you curl your hair, he will not care about your new mascara, he will not notice your new shoes and he can't tell if your shirt matches your earrings. He just can't.
5. Nobody wins if Garrett watches paintball videos while Emily is home.
6. Couple friends: Ready. Set. Find some.
7. You cannot play Settlers of Catan with only two people. This is also true of Shanghai Rummy.
8. Go to college after you get married-- the Financial Aid is fantabulous.
9. You get a lot of advice you never ever asked for.
10. I love you, but leave me alone. No one told us that it was necessary to have alone time, so then we just felt guilty for wanting alone time. Turns out this is a normal thing.
So.... have alone time if you want to stay married.
11. Your single friends are afraid to stay the night at your house.
12. Absolutely no one wants to do the dishes.
13. Do not say 'yes' to anyone before checking with your spouse.
14. Everyone should have a hobby and a job. A stay at home wife will drive both husband and wife crazy.
15. No one ever asked me how to spell 'Collins'...ever.
16. If I had a dollar for the number of times I've heard:
"Wait- you're married?! How old are you?" (I'd have like 40 bucks)
17. "All you need is each other" - False. You still need people.
18. Garrett doesn't believe in making the bed...this gives me hives sometimes.
19. Grocery shopping counts as "date night".
20. Hide your toothbrush.
21. My family is your family; the good, the bad and the sisters.
22. Going out to dinner means the Chik-fil-a drive thru.
23. Pray together and pray for each other. This puts you on the same page and it's much harder to get frustrated with someone you spend time thanking God for.
24. Maybe don't get a black lab puppy right off the bat. Or maybe ever. Adorable-- but needy.
25. "Marriage is like having a sleepover with your best friend every night" Sure. Except your best friend really just wants you to shut up and go to sleep because he has to work in the morning.
26. It's not that easy, but its' really really awesome.
27. My favorite thing about marriage is how much we laugh together.
Maybe I'll be able to offer you some more solid insights in a few decades, but for now this is what I know about marriage: it's scary and it's hard and it's all about putting someone else before yourself every single day, which means it's exhausting.
Living so far away from everything we knew, figuring out a new city, a new church, new friends, new kids, new jobs and new responsibilities has made us more of a team than we ever could've been had we just stayed home.
Marriage is like having one huge inside joke with someone who has seen every failure and understands the joy behind each victory. Life doesn't get easier or prettier or more magical when you get married; but oh my gosh... having someone to share it with is incredible.
Happy October!
-Emily LeVault
